Your story really isn't that interesting

It’s what you do with it that matters.

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⏪ Last time, I shared that I’m planning a content summit! That's here.

⏩ Today, story as our means for imbuing meaning in the mundane.

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I vividly remember my first reporting outing as an intern. I met Jill, who lived in a shelter for homeless families affected by HIV/AIDS in Los Angeles. Jill told me about the moment she learned she was positive—and pregnant. The baby would be born infected.

Jill showed me the four vials of antiretroviral medication her daughter, then 2, had to take each day. She also gave me a tour of the apartment, their home, with visible pride over her child playing in her own toy kitchen. Despite the exceptional hurdles she faced, Jill became a mom and it changed her for good. She had a new story to write.

Before I left, Jill thanked me for letting her tell her story, saying it felt good to share.

It caught me off guard—shouldn’t I be thanking her, I thought—but as I’ve sat down to interview people in the nearly 20 years since, I’ve heard the same sentiment again and again.

It feels good to share.

It’s when we name our experiences that we come to understand them in a new way—especially our own. More importantly, stories help us to understand each other, to see past any label and instead see the person. Maybe even see ourselves.

Story is practically as old as time itself.

“The story—from Rumpelstiltskin to War and Peace—is one of the basic tools invented by the mind of man, for the purpose of gaining understanding,” wrote Ursula K. Le Guin in The Language of the Night. 

It’s a “symbiotic exchange,” one we learn to negotiate in infancy. We even look for a story when it’s not there as researchers found in a 1944 study of college students shown a short film of moving shapes. All but one participant came up with a story to explain what the movements were about. 

People have always told stories, passing down lessons and legends. These stories allow us to go places we never thought we would and meet people we might have otherwise missed.

It’s more than an account of one’s experiences, though—the narrative telling of an event. A story takes a string of events and adds meaning. It selects a batch of information and arranges the details to entertain, educate, inspire and more.

It’s easy to feel like your story isn’t that interesting—for most of us, it isn’t. But storytelling doesn't require grand narratives; it's more often the small, relatable moments that help us connect.

And it’s for everyone, everywhere.

We’re all storytellers. It’s such a natural thing, you might not even realize you encounter story all day long—complete with characters, plot, conflict and resolution.

There’s a protagonist struggling in some relatable way. Her world is changed and something big is at stake, compelling her to act. She faces obstacles along the journey and tension rises as we see what kind of “hero” she will be. When she reaches a turning point, she is changed and ultimately, succeeds or fails.

Pay attention and you’ll see this classic story formula everywhere. It not only captures our attention and draws us in, but it’s how our minds organize reality, store information and make sense of our world.

Character-driven stories captivate us and can affect our behavior.

Thanks to Narrative Transportation, which “hacks” our neurological responses, when your attention is captured, you come to share the emotions of the character and mimic their feelings and behaviors. That’s why you feel invincible after a James Bond movie or crushed after Old Yeller.    

Stories entertain, educate and inspire, and enhance our empathy, motivating us to help others.

Studies show weeks later people better remember and understand a story (even recalling specific points) rather than data. Jennifer Aaker, professor of marketing at the Stanford Graduate School of Business, says people remember information when it is weaved into narratives “up to 22 times more than facts alone.”

I’m willing to bet you’ve been transported by narrative, probably even today. It’s as simple as you opening your social feed. Have you ever stopped on someone’s post about an experience and thought, how cool, let’s do that too—and then bought a ticket or product? That’s story.

As Margaret Atwood said: “A word after a word after a word is power.” 

You’ve heard the saying: Everyone has a story. 

That is 100% true. No one has ever lived your same experience—and no one ever will.

There’s even a journalist who set out to prove it with the story of a 10-year-old boy.

In 1992, Susan Orlean wrote an Esquire cover story: “The American Man at Age Ten.” 

She takes us into the world of an “entirely un-famous subject,” a 10-year-old boy named Colin Duffy. Other Esquire cover subjects from the same year included the likes of Howard Stern, Clint Eastwood, Spike Lee, George H.W. Bush and Winona Ryder. But Orlean profiled a pre-adolescent boy.

The story is about youth and innocence and remembering one’s childhood—about possibility, imagination, freedom. About an ordinary, interesting boy. And we connect to it.

As a creator, you have a unique opportunity to create these connections. Think about your audience and what they care about. Are you sharing stories that connect with their experience? Have you found the common thread between you and your readers? From a shared struggle to a humorous misstep, or simply an observation about life, the mundane moments can create powerful bonds.

As researcher Herminia Ibarra said: “Stories define us. To know someone well is to know her story, the experiences that have shaped her, the trials and turning points that have tested her.”

When you create and tell your story, you start to believe in yourself. 

And what could matter more than that?

Thanks for reading! I’d love to hear if this sparked anything for you. Drop a comment or hit reply. (Hearing from you is almost as good as getting a freshly sharpened pencil bouquet sent to my door.) 🫶 

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